A Man in Uniform

A Man in Uniform


(soft elevator music) – Hi. (laughs) – Hello. – Oh, I just love a man in uniform. You look so handsome. – Thank you, miss. – I don’t know what it is
about a man in uniform, I just go nuts. (laughs) – Years of proud tradition. – No. I think it symbolizes your power. To kill other men with impunity. To mow ’em down with high-powered weapons. (mimics rapid gunfire) Or kill ’em with your own hands even. And of course, you’re
also physically strong and I’m sure the military
made you even stronger, but even the wimpy guys in
uniform still get to kill. – Well, I wouldn’t say get to kill, miss. It’s not like I wanna kill
other human beings for fun. – It’s not like you’re a bad person. You’re a good person. But, you’ve been given the urge to kill and the techniques to do so. – I joined the military
to serve my country, miss. – You’re a loving, caring human being. But, you do get to kill
people and get away with it. Not my fault, I was just
following orders. (laughs) But it is still your
finger on the trigger. (gasps) Have you had the
chance to kill someone yet? – No, no. – Oh, well don’t worry, you will. (laughs) – The military has given me an education. – Education in killing
people 101. (laughs) Oh, no, I’m sorry. You’re a sensitive guy, I can see that. But you’re also a
well-trained killing machine. Ooh, if we were to date, you’d be sensitive to my needs, but I’d also feel safe with
you, because you’re a killer. – I’m not a killer. – Well, technically, maybe you
haven’t killed anybody yet, but still, it’s part of who you are now. It’s in your heart. (laughs) – It is not in my heart. – Oh now you’re just being modest. Of course it’s in your
heart, they’ve put it there. You’ll kill when you get the chance. – I don’t want the chance. – You’ll make us proud. – No. I will not kill another human
being to make you proud. – Uh, you know what, forget it. You’re just like my ex-husband. He looked great in uniform too, but then he went to war and
he killed a bunch of people and he came back with PTSD. He couldn’t handle killing people, so I divorced him. – You divorced your husband
because he had PTSD? – Oh, people think I divorced him because he got his legs blown off, and I’ll admit, that’s not very sexy, but mainly it’s because
he just wasn’t strong. (soft elevator music) Mm, what are you doing? – I quit! – What? – You’re right. This uniform sets my in the
path to becoming a killer. I’ve been trained to
kill other human beings, who I don’t even know, for
reasons I don’t understand and don’t even agree with. I quit! ♪ Off we go into the wild blue yonder ♪ ♪ Climbing high into the sun ♪ ♪ Here they come zooming
to meet our thunder ♪ ♪ At ’em boys give’er the gun ♪
♪ Give’er the gun ♪ ♪ Down we dive spouting
our flame from under ♪ ♪ Off with one hell of a roar ♪ ♪ We live in fame or go down in flame ♪ ♪ Hey nothing’ll stop the US Air Force ♪

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